Stories from an Empty Nester

Wow! I have not blogged since the end of January of this year. Many changes have occured since then. Including...as some of you "forumites" know...that my blog name is not quite appropriate anymore. In late March I found out I am going to be a Mommy again...at the tender age of 43! My youngest is 21 this June and my boyfriend, Larry's youngest is 16 years old. This was not planned, I had myself convinced for a week or so that I was pre-menopausal. I denied the results of not one but two home pregnancy tests, and my bf tried to tell me they were positive. But, one look at my face and he said, "Ok...ok...it is negative...I am going out to the garage." He was calm and not irritaional...unlike me. But, two days later, I made the call to my GYN and it was confirmed...preggers.

Shocked as I was, I smiled as the nurse said, "It is positive" and then I repeated that to the GYN...now my OB-GYN. He smiled and nodded, "I heard her." I went out to the waiting room to retrieve my anxious bf and he knew as soon as I opened the door, "It's positive, huh?"...and you could not have peeled the huge smile from his face.

We went home and assembled four of our total of six kids. My two boys were unable to be there, one being in Alaska and the other with a sick girlfriend who was having a Lupus flare up. We told them in confidence the news and though shocked they took it with exictement. The other four had been texting and talking trying to guess the reason for the "big FAMILY" meeting...and I stress...FAMILY. Since almost day one, we have considered all of our six kids, three grandkids and ourselves as a family. Sundays are family dinner days, as we know the busy lives of our adult children, this gives us at least one day a week to hopefully be together.Yet, we understand when they have other plans.

We made them wait until all four were in the house. Then, my boyfriend made the announcement...we were moving immediately to North Carolina where he was to work for better pay. The faces dropped and like a kindergarten classroom, questions flew in no certain order from all four: who would get what house? Where would the youngest go to school? Larry and I laughed. Finally, Larry admitted he was joking about the move. Then came the "I knew its" and the guesses, "You are engaged", "You're getting married"...and Larry finally hushed them all. Then as he pulled me close, the true announcement, "Barb and I are going to have a baby...she's pregnant." After a silent moment with jaws dropped, eyes widened, the noisy excitement began. My daughter embraced me, his son stunned but joked about the fact his Dad did not heed his own "protection" advice and Dad answered, "Do as I say...NOT as I do!" On and on for a few minutes of hysterics and then the "planning" began, all three girls were planning a baby shower...then it was a vote on the sex of this tiny peanut in my womb...at the end of it the vote was in, five kids said boy and my daughter said a girl. Larry and I didn't vote, we just want a healthy baby. Well..not long after Larry revealed he hoped it was a boy...lol.

It has been over two months since then. The morning sickness has just about passed, I am feeling a lot better and despite a moment  (over a week, actually!)of fear when I began spotting...that has stopped and I am already popping out. Tears cried over putting skinny clothes away, fears of being rejected because i got "fat" and the scared part of me over labor and delivery were vanquished time and again by Larry.  My kids remain supportive, too much at times. Afraid to come to me with life's problems so as not to "stress me out". Bah! I am still their Mom as well as a new Mommy to be.

The same week I found out I was expecting, I interviewed  as a nurse for a part time per diem position and got the job. Oh boy! I was fearful I would not make it through training with morning sickness and all, but I did. Even though I had to miss a week of work on bed rest for the spotting, my employers understood and told me the baby and I come first...my job would still be there.  I am now officially done training, save for being trained in blood draw for labs at another place. I made it through those tough weeks, both the morning sickness and the training.

Though at some point I will have to change the name of my blog...I suppose...I have not truly had an empty nest in almost a year. My daughter and her sons moved in with me last summer, then I moved in with Larry. His youngest son lives here as does his daugher and grand daughter. I remember clearly one winter's Sunday making breakfast, my youngest son came in and smiled at me as I washed dishes while finishing breakfast up and starting the dinner. "So, Mom how does feel to have a family to care for once again...to make meals and such?". I exhaled and smiled, "Wonderful."

My family is even more complete now as my son who was stationed in Alaska with the Army is officially home, not on leave, but for good. He will join the reserves in August and start college in the fall. It still amazes me when he walks through my door for a visit, a meal or to do laundry. I can tell you, I don't mind mid-laundry when he has to run "errands for an hour or so" and I finish his laundry. I feel...well, complete. For awhile with the tiredness and morning sickness that could last all day, I didn't feel like me. Too tired to cook good meals or on bed rest and not able to be up and about, I would cry. Larry would reassure me that I most definitely was me and that I would again feel as though I was. He would smile and say, "Awww...the hormones of it all!". I would laugh because I knew he was right and I know he loves me.

So, here we are over two years later since I started this blog....an empty nest no more. This is from my second blog....and it is foretelling of the future...peace and quiet...LOL! Here we go again <wink>!!

...Still, I look back and hear myself in frustration calling out to them, "Kids, all i want is a little peace and quiet!" Well, I got it. Though it was not what it was cracked up to be at first. I am enjoying it. Except for when the dog and cat decide to play tag and I yell at them, "Can't I get a little peace and quiet?" And like my kids, they stop for a second and then resume the barking, the hissing and the play. Ain't life grand?... now I hear the pitter patter of tiny feet...joining in unison with his or her nephews and niece...lol.